Would this relationship work?
My parents’ co-investor’s son is 21 right now. He just finished undergrad at Beijing University, and he got accepted into an Ivy League for graduate school. His parents toured America a few months ago, and they really liked me. My parents are thinking about “getting us together.”Would this relationship work?
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This might be a little bit uncommon, but please hear me out.
My family is into business/corporation/investment in China, and so most of my parents’ friends are also businesspeople. I came to America to go to school (I’m in California right now) and I am a high school junior right now. To most of the people in my school, I am just like them, and I dont wish to make myself any different by telling them this. That is why I am asking for your opinion.
Because he would be on the other side of country… should we both just “know” that we have a relationship, but then keep hanging out with other people? Obviously, I’m not going to see him until I graduate from high school.
Personally, I don’t feel hostility towards that idea. I mean… I knew this was going to happen sooner or later, and his parents are very nice and cultuered people. However, I don’t even know what our relationship would be called.
My parents seem to like him a lot. He’s good looking, educated, and of course, match our family well. But I have never met him before. My dad said that if I *do* actually like him, our relationship would get more serious (just as engagement).Would this relationship work?
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It’s so difficult to explain. Another family friend’s daughter got engaged to a young man when she was 17, but they never really got together until she was 21. During these years, she (and he, too, I suppose) just continued her “normal” life (even though she has a fiance). They were both fine with it, and they ended up falling in love with each other.
Do you think I should do the same thing? Keep the relationship away for a while? I don’t want to have to reject guys by telling them that I already have a fiance.
I hope what I said made sense.
Yes, some of you pointed it out, this is almost like an arranged marriage.
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Comment by Medi
wow interesting, well its arragnemarrages…. and its up to you two to figure out wat u guys want
Comment by bartmore
you are already married off to that son so get used to the idea..but you need to let them know u r in college and r/ship you ain’t any of that
Comment by DeLaNo'S GiRL
then dont enjoy your freedom now go out this is your prime girl! get with it! i mean dont be a whore just keep your options open date lots and meet new people and then later when you guys “r spose to be together” if u still want to and havent met someone u really wanna be with then youll know its meant to be!
Comment by hazel w
omg
Comment by k4k07
maybe if u knew this was coming and he is good looking, get to know him well before u make any decisions. go ou of ur way 2 personally speak 2 him, just u n him and see if u like him, u never no sometimes ur parents can suprise u n pick a winner
Comment by Sinful
get engaged dont tell anyone & still look around, your heart is going to tell you who is the one for you, I can tell you respect your parents a lot, but that doesnt mean they can tell you who you can spend the rest of your life with, its not fair.
Comment by Anonymous MC
This young man seems like a wonderful person, and you might want to meet him.
But that is no reason to get engaged. You’ve never met him! This almost sounds like an arranged marriage. Keep your options open. You never know if you’ll meet someone you love before you meet him!
If, when you have a chance to meet him and get to know him, you really do love him, go for it.
Comment by Worker Bee
Would this relationship work? It might. There are no guarantees.
People marry all the time asking themselves that very question, many even during the marriage ceremony.
Sounds much like what is called an arranged marriage, a cultural thing perhaps. We all have them in some form or fashion. If its acceptable to you, and you say you don’t feel hostility towards the idea, then that’s just how things are done in your culture. Sounds like your parents aren’t doing too badly by you.